Most Stupid Race of All
A racially insensitive commentary
Although, the title of this article is not politically correct, the readers are advised not to fly off the handle
just yet because I'm not referring to any of the color-coded races as we know them. It's not about White,
Black, Yellow, Red, or Stripes. There is no factual evidence confirming that any of these "races" being
more or less stupid than the others.
But I have an undeniable intelligence confirming that all human races are equally stupid! Therefore, if you
are a member of human race of any color, this is the time and opportunity for you to officially get offended
by this racial slur.
However, before presenting the case against humanity and to alleviate the hostility of the readers toward
this writer, it is imperative to clarify a few points.
My fellow humans beings, I am one of you, a member of the human race and I have my valid driver's
license and one more piece of government issued ID for verification purposes. So rest assured that I am
not an irresponsible crocodile on the brink of extinction, a pissed off rhino or some other irritated
endangered specie that goes around and shoots his mouth and spreads racially motivated comments
against humanity for the sake of retaliation.
Therefore, although the facts presented here may be examined for accuracy, the motive and intention of
this writer should not be questioned.
The truth is that recently under a very unusual circumstance, I acquired a highly classified document that
was circulating among sub-humans regarding human race. Believe me, I’m not too pleased to be involved
with such controversial issue myself either. Unlike lucky people who find a bag full of cash on the street, I
happened to find this file. Yet due to the significance of this unique discovery and the immense impact it
has on the future of our race, I decided to publish its findings.
Therefore, I am taking tremendous risks by publishing this exposé. Undoubtedly they (sub-humans, ghouls
etc.) will try to silence my voice and stop me from revealing their secrete plot.
The document starts with an elaborate analysis carried out by the “Center for Strategic Studies for the
Survival of Sub-humans”. Based on their study of human behavior our race was declared to be the most
stupid race of all. The accuracy of their study and the impeccable historical references presented in this
document are astonishing.
According to sub-humans our stupidity is directly proportional to our technological achievements and
social advancements. They are convinced that as we become more and more civilized we tend to become
more and more segregated. They argue that the source of this inexplicable phenomenon manifested only
in human race must be our "intelligence" which they always refer to as stupidity.
They believe that the animosity among us is the pinnacle of our stupidity, which will result in our self-
destruction as a race. This is how we have been portrayed in this report. This is how the human race is
viewed from outside.
This document claims that humans are the only species that have an idiotic talent to create unjustifiable
divisions among themselves based on color, ethnic background, nationality, gender, ideology and religion.
The report reads, “We have never heard for example white mules kill black mules because of their skin
color. We know they throw a few kicks at each other over a beautiful female donkey, this is reasonable but
bloodshed over skin color is unheard of.
We have never seen for example thousands of Asian monkeys savagely attack their fellow Amazonian
relatives across the globe simply because of their ethnicities.
We have never experienced land disputes and religious conflicts among animals. These are unique
characteristics of human race. Humans must be so outrageously stupid.”
This document also demonstrates another troubling historical trend among humans. It claims that only
human beings have a knack to choose stupid leaders for themselves. (The photocopy of the IQ tests
results taken by the most world leaders was presented in the file for further review and examination. It
clearly showed some leaders are even more stupid than their own followers!). This is incomprehensible to
sub-human species. George W Bush, the American president was frequently named as example.
They wrote in the report, “These dumb human beings choose dumber leaders and blindly follow their leads
and commit the most heinous crimes against each other with no remorse in the name of humanity. What
kind of logic is that? Human beings never learn although they have much more recorded history in books in
their libraries and in their newspapers archives. Why don’t they search the subject on the Internet and
read? We are puzzled.
The human history is filled with crooked leaders who callously turned simple differences among humans
into antagonistic disputes and created wars. Humans killed more of their own species than all other sub-
human species combined. Why don’t these idiots learn from their own history?”
"Due to the dark and gloomy outcome of human evolution, we beasts are convinced that evolution is not a
viable option for us. We have issued a warning to all species including worms and maggots and urge them
to stop their evolution projects until further notice.” The report reads.
In the light of recent discoveries, the report continues, "the human race is a clear and present danger.
These jack-asses are not worthy of this beautiful planet and must be eliminated before they destroy the
entire planet." (At the bottom of the same page, in an explanatory footnote they formally apologized to all
honorable jack-asses for this improper reference.)
To accomplish this task, sub-humans are carrying out a sophisticated plot to get rid of human race. The
chimpanzees are suspected leaders of this anti-human movement. They know we are on the road to
perdition. No wonder they always mock us by showing their ugly teeth and mooning us! This mooning
gesture symbolizes their defiance to human race. They are inviting us to kiss their ass.
But their conspiracy to destroy the human race is more sophisticated than what we may think. They work
on different levels. According to the recommendations presented in this document, they have penetrated
into our civilized societies. They have insiders among us disguised as human beings and operating as high
ranking politicians and religious leaders who have legal and moral authorities over us to expedite the
annihilation of the human race.
Therefore, the presidents of our countries and leaders who we devotedly follow may look and act like
stupid humans but they may actually be smart undercover chimpanzees relentlessly carrying out their evil
mission. These undercover agents have successfully used the weapons of mass sedation to tranquilize us,
to make us as indifferent as possible to our destiny on earth. They have inoculated human race against
feeling and understanding the pain and suffering of our fellow human beings.
This is an apocalyptic scenario orchestrated against human race. To preserve our human dignity and our
livelihood on this planet we must act now before it’s too late.